Mother of the Bride Spot

Random thoughts on being a Mother of the Bride...although since we are now past The Wedding, perhaps this would be better titled Random Thoughts On Life In General...

Friday, March 31, 2006

Gift to the Very Clean Mole


This is the wonderful picture Rosie sent that Christmas....

Thursday, March 30, 2006

One Wedding and A Reunion

What an amazing weekend! The Bob and I left for Jackson, MS for his first "vacation" from job hunting (hey -- he's on that, 40+ hours a week!!) last Thursday. We will not discuss crowded airplanes or the sheer delight of middle seats less we distract from the point of this blog -- but we WILL mention the sheer audacity of Northwest Airlines to charge -- oh my, I just can't believe it -- $15 -- that is, FIFTEEN DOLLARS for an aisle seat!!! Not that I actually got an aisle seat on Delta -- no, I did with the middle, but counted myself very lucky to have gotten a seat at all, given that when I went to choose our seats -- there weren't any. But I've been there, done that in a previous post, so -- on with the weekend!!

First of all, I have the most wonderful family in the entire world. Two sisters, two brothers in law, one brother, one sister in law, assorted nieces and nephews, cousins and children of cousins...and of COURSE, my own dearest family...Jill, Derrick and The Grandbaby, Deven; Torrey and Chris -- the MC; Timothy -- AKA Timo, the 6-4 college senior.... AND -- My Bobbert. DH of nearly 36 years.

So -- any excuse for a family reunion...

Robbie and Tina's wedding was the consummate excuse. We had a wonderful time. I will say, however, that I have NEVER gotten lost as many times as we did over the weekend. Case in point: Rehearsal dinner at Resevoir Pointe. No problem -- Mapquest will take us there. Uh -- well, maybe not quite. "Right on Breakers for 0.2 miles, left on something or other ...." If the headlights hadn't been on we would have ended up IN the resevoir. "Road Closed" "Do not enter" -- made it a bit tough to find where we were supposed to be, but eventually (oh, thank the Lord He invented cell phones!!) we got there. Since we went the wrong way to get to our hotel to begin with, this was actually the second "lost." We found the church for the wedding -- we got lost IN the church. I mean, who would expect the wedding to be held in a church that had no roof on the sanctuary. (It wasn't in the sanctuary -- it was in the gym which was decorated beautifully). We also got hopelessly lost on the way to the absolutely gorgeous home of friends of Rosie & Rob's in Brookhaven after the wedding where we gathered for dinner....My vote: Make street signs big enough so OLD people can read them....

Anyway. It seemed hard to believe that we were actually at Robbie and Tina's wedding...with Our Wedding not quite 4 months behind us. The rehearsal dinner was especially poignant -- just a short 17 months before at Helen Clare's rehearsal dinner -- there was no Chris for our Torrey; there was no Tina for our Robbie. Lesson:

1. God answers prayer -- amazingly and when you least expect it.
2. God answers prayer -- in His timing.

(Remind me of this when I get discouraged about the job hunt).

One of the best parts of the entire weekend was catching up with the most wonderful and amazing Gen X kids. Mine, Rosie's, Lyn's, and Maren & Pierce -- daughter and son of my cousin Arlo (I'll share the pancake story one of these days...not to be missed). My cousin David and his wife Katie were there from Maryland. Arlo came from London (as did Helen Clare and Adam) and Pierce from Tokyo. An international wedding -- though Rob considers us "northerners" international as well (he's still fighting the Civil War, bless his peapickin' little heart). And catching up with Rob's family!! They are so special too....Nonnie -- Rob's mother -- is Nonnie to us all.

And now it is Thursday of the Week After The Wedding. Robbie & Tina are on their honeymoon in Teluride, our Tim is in Dry Torguas for spring break, Torrey & Chris are hard at work in Indy, Jill & Derrick are interviewing for jobs in Naples, FL, (while Bob is interviewing for jobs here...), Helen Clare and Adam have left for London; Liz Anne is back at Covenant College, Reuben at Mississippi College, Lyn & Tim are on their way back to Montrose after stopping at a few more places to visit their supporters, Rosie has a few more days off before starting back as a school nurse, Rob is preparing his sermon for Sunday, Rick & Susan, David & Katie are at their usual jobs, Bob is job hunting, and I'm preparing to do a 6 day course next week. AND looking forward to Torrey & Chris coming for a visit this weekend.

Can't have enough of my kids!

Meanwhile, we all have a glow that comes with spending time with family that you love.

And Helen Clare has started her own blog to keep folks up to date on what is happening to "A Southerner in London." http://a-southerner.blogspot.com/

Don't forget to visit Torrey's Blog as well to see life from the viewpoint of the MC: http://www.marriedcouplebyTorrey.blogspot.com

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

A Rose by Any Other Name....

The female half of the MC says that I have to name everything. Well, not quite. Just because I named her house "Dumpling", and my car is "Beast" (though the license plate claims it is "Janz Lmo" -- hey, it is a used '97 Lincoln Town car bought off the parking lot of the funeral home which (comfortably) holds 6 in the car and 4 in the trunk!), Bob's car is "Madame Blueberry" -- what does she mean, I have to name everything??

Just because I morphed Torrey's name into Tobi (Tor-rey B.....To--bee....Tobi), and Christopher is The Beamer (see the July 22 blog), and Bob is Bobbert, and Timothy grew up as Timo, while Jill was either Jill-o-wee or Jilly Bean...what does she mean?

A few years ago when my mother was taking her final steps heavenward, my two sisters were helping to care for her. One day, Rosie was feeling especially grumpy which led her to declare herself a toad. Whereupon Lyn became Frog -- and they dubbed me Mole -- albeit a Very Clean Mole. Of course, the names took on a life of their own -- poor Lyn owns more frog things than she ever desired and I can't even look at frog paraphenalia in a catalog without thinking of her -- last year's Christmas gift was a retro cookie jar as....a frog. Rosie has been a bit harder to gift. A couple of years ago I sent her one bottle of Black Toad Ale which I found at Trader Joe's. Since Rosie and beer are not intimately acquainted, the bottle remains unopened in a place of honor (?) in her kitchen. Last Christmas I found some Toad Sweat hot sauce in the Outer Banks. Have no clue as to how it tastes -- and I don't think she does either. I have been able to find a couple of ornaments that were appropriately toadish however.

They have had a bit more difficulty finding things Mole. BUT!! A few Christmases ago I received a photograph from Rosie & Rob of a white, 1960 Cadillac convertible with -- you guessed it -- a mole (dead) as driver. Reuben loaned his model Cadillac, Rosie found the dead mole, and Rob hunkered down to get the picture. It is one of my all time favorite gifts.

Steph, The Beamer's sister, recently had a darling baby girl and named her Molly.

Because, The Beamer told me, his father used to call his mother -- are you ready for this --

Molly the Mole.

I didn't believe it either.

I mean, what are the odds?

So there you have it. Judy and Jan -- (Very Clean) Mole Mothers.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Catalogs as Temptation

By the way, I'm NOT reading, thumbing through, perusing, or in any other manner even LOOKING at the hundreds of catalogs which I receive on a monthly (weekly? daily?) basis.

Nope. No way, no how.

Begone, Nordstrom's! Out of here, Drapers! Not looking at ya, Ross-Simons! Chadwick's? You're history.

Sigh.

Unemployment....

If Bob had worked a typical 9 to 5 and not put in extra time in the evenings and weekends, he would still have a job. What irony that because he did so very well -- he was fired. "Bob, you've done a great job. You've exceeded our expectations. You've given the company a lot to do over then next few months. Therefore, we don't need you any more.....and yes, today is your last day.....clean out your desk."

Friday the 13th will never look the same again. This happened in January to the job he had had for just over one year. He was let go from his previous position at a hospital where he had worked for nearly 20 years to make way for restructuring. This time it was because he worked too well, too efficiently, and gave the company too much to do. They did give him severance....today is the first day of the last paycheck.

So now what? He's put in application to over 40 companies in the Chicagoland area. He's had 8 preliminary interviews and has been on the "short list" for 6 of the companies. He's had second interviews at two of the companies -- both of which decided he wasn't right for the job. His first choice turned him down, choosing someone with more experience in nursing home administration. His second choice turned him down, choosing someone with more experience in running clinics. His third choice turned him down -- he's not sure why. He's still on the short list for his fourth, fifth, and sixth choices. He has a second interview tomorrow....

We talked about him trying to get a part time job, or doing locum tenens as a nursing home administrator -- but he's putting in 40 to 50 hours a week just looking for a job. In typical Bob fashion, he's job hunting the way he tackled his regular employment -- full time and overtime. When would he have time to work?

This morning he went over to the church where they were having a seminar for the unemployed. He's then going to First Transitions to talk to Mary to evaluate the mock video interview he did last week. He's supposed to be home in time to see Jill and Deven when they come over. He's counseling other unemployed people. He's going through at least 100 websites and reviewing them each week, sending in his resume if a new job appears. In short, he's doing everything he can.

Meanwhile, I pray for speaking engagements and am grateful for the programs we already have scheduled.

I'm also trying to figure down how to cut expenses....I read about a woman who decided to "undergo 'an X-treme trial of nonconsumption' -- a year of purchasing only bare necessities." She wrote a book about it which I'd like to get, "Not Buying It: My Year Without Shopping." I need to figure out what are "necessities" and what aren't.

I'm afraid my manicures will have to go. After tomorrow's, that is. We've already cut down eating out -- but I think we'll cut it out, not down. This will be a good time to clean out my makeup. I'll just use up all the old stuff. I'm hoping I can get along with all the spring/summer clothes I had last year so I don't have to purchase new.

I'm grateful that The Wedding is over and paid for -- and Tim's schooling is paid for -- our two major expenses for 2005. We don't have any debts except the mortgage....Thank you Lord for that.

Yup, I think I'll have to get that book.

At the library, of course!

Friday, March 17, 2006

Salt Lake City

I'm cozily ensconsed in what might be the nicest Radisson hotel rooms I've ever been in -- complete with gas burning fireplace, two queen size beds, and delicious chocolates. I've been in SLC since Sunday afternoon -- we (Linda, Carole & I) did a 5 day Lactation Consultant Prep Program here for a group of close to 40 participants.

I've not been to SLC for (mumble mumble) years when Marilou, Diane and I took a Westward Ho trip the summer between our junior and senior years in nursing school. All I remember from our one day here was swimming in the great Salt Lake (I think I have a picture of us) and visiting Temple Square.

The people here have been wonderful -- friendly and hospitable. They are used to lots of visitors as the skiing is great. So I hear, anyway. I've never been on a ski in my life.

The city is laid out in a grid -- amazingly easy to find your way around once you learn that North and South Temple run east and west, and East and West Temple run -- you guessed it, north & south.

I can't say too much for the food. In fact, the less said, the better. OTOH, the less I eat, the better.

I'm glad to be going home tomorrow -- as much as I love speaking -- I miss being home. Traveling gets old after awhile.

A week from today our family -- our ENTIRE family -- will be together in Jackson MS for Robbie & Tina's wedding.

That's one trip I can't wait to make!!

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Stepping Heavenward....

....was the title of a very old book that my mother allowed me to read on Sundays. (Sundays, being a day of rest, was saved for biographies, missionary epics and Bible stories -- at least when I was a preteen). Stepping Heavenward was fiction, but written in a journal form so it appeared to be autobiographical. Written in the late 1800s, it captured my fancy -- and that of both my sisters when they became older. I think each of us has a copy somewhere, though I'd be hard pressed to put my hands on the falling out pages right now.

While we are all in the process of stepping heavenward -- or not, as the case may be -- one of my dearest friends just took her last step on March 1. Marsha was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer the first of February, 2005. 90% of all those with this type of cancer die within a year -- Marsha lasted 13 months. But Marsha didn't just *last*. Marsha ministered to all of us that came in contact with her during this time. Her daughter, Linnea, and husband Ed kept us all appraised of what was happening through "Marsha's Blog". The scripture they posted that they found helpful, the words of the hymns that particularly spoke to them touched each of us that looked for updates nearly daily.

The memorial service on Sunday was packed out. It was beautiful. Ed and Linnea sang while son Paul played the cello. There were hymns, remembrances, reflections, and a brief message.

For nearly 24 years I could call Marsha my friend. I'm so very glad I knew her. She and Ed were part of our Life Group for about the past 15. Paul and Torrey went through elementary, middle, and high school together.

She knew I didn't cook, but she would say to me, "Jan, Jan, if you can read, you can cook...."

It didn't improve my cooking, but it did make me laugh!

Her husband and children called her blessed -- as in Proverbs 31.

The rest of us do too.

And we were blessed to be a part of her life.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

On Conferences and Family

Got home last night from speaking at a conference in Appleton WI. There were about 330 people there -- many more turned away as the ballroom couldn't hold them all. This is an incredibly well done conference -- Wisconsin Association of Lactation Consultants -- and they do it yearly. This was my second time to speak, and I had a wonderful time! First of all, one of the other speakers is a dear friend of mine, so just being with her was a treat. Secondly I got to meet (in person -- we've communicated by e-mail), Harvey Karp, author of the wildly popular book, "Happiest Baby on the Block" (also Happiest Toddler....haven't read that one...what I need is one entitled "Happiest College Senior...." and "Happiest Unemployed Husband...." since I already have the "Happiest MCs...")

But I digress. The conference committee was stellar, and let me tell you, they know how to treat a speaker! We were wined & dined and pampered. It was lovely.

Let me put in a plug for Appleton and the Radisson Paper Valley Hotel as well -- Appleton is SMOKE FREE!!! That is a BIG deal. And the hotel is extremely nice. Good food -- the coffee served at our buffet breakfast on Friday was outstanding. There's a Starbucks in the hotel -- more about that in a minute.

A real super treat was meeting up with my cousin Ruth -- whom, she pointed out -- I've not seen since 1968 at the occasion of her brother Bruce's wedding. Ruth is a first cousin on my father's side -- Daddy had 9 brothers and sisters, most of whom were rather prolific in the offspring department, so I have -- many first cousins. Lots and lots and lots. Ruth is a master at keeping us all together through her monthly "Cuz Nuz" a beautifully done newsletter that contains all the news the family sends her. I've not attended a family reunion since the summer between my junior and senior years in nursing school, so don't really know too many of my kith and kin on that side. We are hoping to remedy that by attending this year's reunion in Kansas.

Anyway, Ruth and I had coffee in the Starbucks -- I had a capuccino, she had tea -- and we talked non-stop for 45 minutes until I had to head off for the meeting. The music playing in the Starbucks was Chris Tomlin, a wonderful Christian singer -- we were so surprised -- and very pleased.

Family is good. More about our extended "Life Group" family here in Wheaton in the next blog...

And I didn't even get lost going OR coming home!